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From Oregonian, 2/24/13
Sconce, Marianne Barde 69 Dec. 28, 1943 Feb. 12, 2013 What a beautiful lady we have lost. Marianne Barde Sconce passed away Feb. 12, 2013, at home from ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease). Marianne was born Dec. 25, 1943, to Stanley and Bonnie Elmgren. Born and raised in Portland, she attended West Sylvan Grade School and was a 1962 graduate of Sunset High School. In 1962 she was a member of the "Miss Raindrop Court," sponsored by the Portland Rainmakers.
In 1966 Marianne started her working career at Deluxe Check Printers in Beaverton, Ore. She remained with Deluxe retiring as a Customer Service Representative in 1996 after 30 years of service. While working at Deluxe her beautiful smile and positive attitude were appreciated by all of her fellow workers. Known as Mare, she often said she had two families, her family at home and her family at work with many of her coworkers becoming lifelong friends. After retiring, Marianne settled into the home life with her dogs by her side still missing that part of her life she retired from. As a single girl in 1976, she purchased her first house and her interior decorating talents came alive.
On Oct. 3, 1982, Marianne and Robb Sconce were married, celebrating their 30th anniversary together this past October. Always having a dog as a companion since her childhood, she and Robb raised five during their 40 years together. In 2000, she found her dream house on Bull Mountain in Tigard, and it was here she was most happy and content, being the "house boss," and helping Robb with his construction company.
When one thinks of Marianne, they think of that smile. She had the most beautiful smile. A smile that would light up a room, that was larger than life, and that just made you feel good.
She had such a bubbly personality. She loved her quiet times at home, her vast music collection, trips to the ocean, decorating her house, loving her dogs and husband, her glass of wine, her pizza and steak, tending to her flowers, chocolate, and cooking holiday meals for friends and family.
In August 2011, Marianne was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease. With her health gradually deteriorating over the months, she entered into Providence Hospice case in September of 2012. As she wished, she was able to remain at home during the duration of her illness. With Baylee, her beloved Bichon Frise and husband Robb by her side, she peacefully passed away without a struggle at 7:30 a.m. Feb. 12, 2013.
Robb wishes to thank Providence Hospice for all of the help provided to Marianne. Also a special thank you to Hospice nurse Kristi, Hospice personal attendant Kristi, and in-home caregiver Yerem for the fantastic care given to Marianne by them.
Marianne is survived by her husband, Robb Sconce of Tigard; sisters, Jeanette, Susanne and Beverly; brother in-law, Skip Sconce; nephew, John Sconce; and niece, Jennifer Weldon. A private service was held Feb. 21, 2013. Interment is at Finley-Sunset Hills Memorial Park, Portland. A celebration of life will be held in early spring at Robb and Marianne's residence. Please make remembrances in Marianne's name to ALS Association of Oregon and SW Washington.
To my wife and best friend, "You can rest your smile now Marianne, for it has brought so much joy to many."
Mary Jardine McClasson sent the following into the website.
Marianne died on Tuesday Feb. 12. Her husband Robb kissed her at 7:30 a.m. that morning after she had been asleep for 48 hours. Her breathing was shallow at that time. He told her that he loved her, and she looked up at him. Robb said that around 10 seconds later she closed her eyes and passed on. Robb made it possible for Marianne to stay in their home with nurses coming in to help him care for her after her Lou Gehrig's disease progressed.
She was a mighty warrior and an incredibly positive person.
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Mary Aileen Jardine (McGlasson)
Thank you so much for putting the pictures up, Jean. Aren't they lovely. You can see a little part of Marianne and Robb's beautiful home in the one. She was very proud of it. One of her hobbies was gardening and she excelled.
She was an animal lover, too, and always was. I can remember her Mother's talking mynah bird in a large cage in the kitchen. Marianne always had a dog, and cared for each one as if he were a child. That is often said about people who haven't had a child but I say, no, you either love animals that much or you don't. My husband and I hide the people talk we engage in with our pug around here.
I'll never forget times with Marianne, mostly in our sophmore year after she got her driver's license. She was ready for the test the day after she became 16 because she practiced driving her new car alone (and with me-ha) on the roads around her house in the months before.
I did not drive, at that time, and she carted me around. Every morning she got off the highway (did we call it a freeway then?) to pick me up for school. It now makes me laugh because I thought it was "childish" to ride the school bus. Marianne was never late and she was always cheerful. What a nice way for me to start the day. We had nicknames for each other. Her father told her a joke which she repeated to me and we laughed so hard at the characters that we called each other, Georgia (m.b) and Sapphire (me) from then on. She could make me laugh like no other. I'm not telling the joke on here...ask me at a reunion sometime.
Our friendship could have gotten me in trouble in Mr. Uyesugi's English class sophmore year. I have already written about our mad run from P.E. at one end of the building to the other. The funny part about our immaturity is that I wrote a "fan" letter a few years back to Mr. U and I mentioned it. When he wrote me back he told me that he knew all about our showing off; our Olympics ready "slide and land" into our desks.
Others of you will remember that Marianne's adopted father, who gave her the name Barde, loved to play Dixieland music turned up loud on the record player while he accompanied the music on his set of drums. She'd roll her eyes but enjoyed him none the less. My own stepfather, Cliff, especially liked two of my friends, mainly because they'd spend time talking to him when they came over to our house. I dated Ken Vanderzanden from Hillsboro for one summer, and he'd be out kicking my Dad's jeep tires along with him, and "shooting the bull". He was really liked and Marianne was the same. She was interested in my Dad and she showed it.
Marianne was known for her year around sun tan and her very blond hair; It gave her a bit of a sexy look. She was ahead of her time with the hair, don't you think? The guys lined up at her door, but that was mainly because she was a good listener and just a lot of fun. It is some kind of irony that the 'girl' who couldn't keep a straight face all of her life would develop what I would rightfully say is the worst disease you can end up with. Lou Gehrig's Disease or ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis) Google it to get the impact of what she suffered.
How does one deal with the loss of a friend to such a disease? For me it is to honor her memory, to cherish Marianne's personality as I remember it, and to see life as it really is. There are deadends that eventually open out to the hereafter. We luckily do not know our future. We must live for today and for others.
I have this saying on a small card, "The Less you justify Joylessness The more you'll Enjoy Life."
Enjoy life like Marianne did.
I have a box of cards with sayings to read when one needs a lift. There are some that I have read tonight that remind me of Marianne and her travails and finally the memory of her beauty.
a Haiku:
"Though it be broken, broken again-still it's there: the moon on the water."
"The piece of the Soul that is gone in the dark shines on..."
"Out of the earth, the rose, Out of the night, the dawn, Out of my heart with all its woes, High courage to press on."
"The difficult we do immediately, the impossible takes a little longer."
"All we need to make the day go better is to remember our friends, or maybe one friend's face."
"Turning full around to find the sun still there..."
"We are each responsible for our own present happiness."
"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."
The light shed by any good relationship illuminates all relationships."
"Stars over snow, and in the west a planet swinging below a star-Look for a lovely thing and you will find it. It is not far-it never will be far."
"Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your task, go to sleep, God is awake." Victor Hugo
"Home is the definition of God." Emily Dickenson
"Colors receive their brilliance and movement from the darkness they are overcoming."
" God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."
" When the heart weeps for what it has lost, the spirit laughs for what it has found."
"I believe that man will not merely endure; he will prevail. He is immortal, he has a soul, a spirit capable of compassion and sacrifice and endurance." Faulkner
and thinking of Marianne...
"That best portion of a good man's life, his little, nameless unremembered acts of kindness and love," Wordsworth
(ask me if you want to know who wrote any of the ones with author's not mentioned)
Mary Aileen
Shirley Anne Martin (McGrath)
I am so touched by this tribute. I remember Marianne vividly and am so sorry she had to suffer. Thank you to Mary for her beautiful memorial.
Shirley Martin McGrath 2/10/16
Laun Carlin
Excellent Mary, straight emotion. You reminded us of what a wonderful heart Marianne had.
Mary Aileen Jardine (McGlasson)
Thank you Shirley and Laun. I sent the link to the site and this page to Marianne's husband Robb, and I got a lovely reply back today. He is a great guy and he misses her terribly. He lives in the house with his memories and will visit her grave on Sunday. He tells lovely things about his wife and you can see the depth of his love. It is beyond touching to me...no words can descibe someone's else's grief but you can imagine yourself going through what he has.
He has a full time job and is working hard. I'm sure that helps some. Thanks again...see you soon at O'Connors I hope Laun. I know you live far, Shirley, but will see you sometime when you are up here!
( I won't be at the first Tues. lunch in March because its just a few days after I have eye surgery, but I'll be there in April for sure. ) Mary
Bill (William Thomas) Blank
I would just like to share that I also agree that this is a heartfelt tribute. I knew her as a classmate in Mr. U's class and I think she enjoyed messing with his mind a little. Ha, ha. Other than that, maybe an occasional reunion. But what makes these comments special are they come from a life long friend, and mean so much more. I attended her memorial at their home. I still remember the photo memorial Rob put up throughout their home. She loved to be photographed and to photograph her friends and family. I was able to spend some time alone with Rob. I tried to give him some support because I had gone through the ordeal of losing a wife to cancer years before. I am glad he is doing well. He deserves to find some measure of happiness, along with his memories.